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Facebook: Sarah Naisiae Kanoy 


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Identity Crisis

September 10, 2015

March 2012: It was spring break of my senior year of nursing school.  I wanted to be on a fun trip to the beach; however, I found myself overwhelmed by projects and papers that needed to be done before graduation.  So, I locked myself in my room and decided I was going to write as many papers over break as possible.  One of these papers was supposed to be about my vocare.  This particular assignment was centered on me writing about my calling in life.


When I sat down to write this paper, I had every intention of writing about being a nurse and serving God through medicine.  However, as I began to write, I realized this was not my calling.  It was like a light bulb had gone on above my head—ding—I am not called to be a nurse!  What a shocking and earth-shaking discovery for me!


You see, my calling is centered on what Jesus commanded us to do in Mark 12:30-31: “And you must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, all your mind, and all your strength[…]Love your neighbor as yourself.”  I am called to love God and love others.  I am incredibly blessed that I get to fulfill this calling through nursing!


In May of 2012, I graduated with my Bachelor of Science in Nursing.  I was overjoyed—the long-awaited day was here, I was finally a nurse!  However, over the past 3 years working as an Intensive Care Unit (ICU) nurse, I have somehow forgotten or strayed away from that spring break discovery.  Recently, I realized that I had developed a sense of great pride in my role as a nurse.  I was an ICU nurse—that was my identity.  However, God has humbled me and reminded me that my greatest identity is not as a nurse; instead, it is as a child of God!  In 1 Peter 2:9 we read “But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people belonging to God, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light.”


As I prepare to move to another continent, country, community, and culture, there is only so much my suitcases can hold.  I will not be able to take everything with me.  However, one incredible thing I can take is my identity!  Romans 8:15b states: “[…]You received God’s Spirit when he adopted you as his own children.  Now we call him, ‘Abba, Father.’”  No matter what happens, no matter the challenges and joys, nothing can change the fact that I am a child of God!  I have the great joy of being able to call Him “daddy.”  I can lean on His promises and love.  My joy doesn't come from being a nurse, it comes from being a child of God!




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